Icebreakers
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Do you care more about pleasing your partner or speaking the truth? What is one instance of this?
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I think it is better the truth from what I've seen n learned from him is that is better to tell each other things n not keep quiet of course I sometimes prefer to pleased him n don't say anything to not hurt him or create a serious problem between us
Truth. Telling them what they want to hear is technically lying.
Speaking the truth
I speak the truth. It might hurt his feeling, but to break that trust and honesty we have would hurt our relationship.
I almost always (as in 99% of the time) speak the truth. I try to be careful with how I say things, but I don't sugarcoat things. With that said, I try to let her pick our lunch/dinner locations but she resists and tries to get me to pick. It's probably the one thing I consistently prefer to please her about, but it rarely works (she rarely has something in mind).
When I am being conscious about it, I care a lot about his feelings. But sometimes I get angry and when anger comes into the picture, I say things that are hurtful. I need to work on that.
I’m usually very torn, but I try to find a good marriage of both values.
It depends on the topic. If it is a topic I know is sensitive to your heart I am more interested in protecting your feelings but if its a topic of opinion or fact I speak the truth.
I care more about pleasing you except when I think you are doing something that will harm you, your career, your reputation, or others perception of you (only those people who's perception of you is valued by you), then I speak the truth, like with your leprechaun incident.
Male, >50 years, Married, CA, US | Jan 09, 2012
Male, >50 years, Married, CA, US | Jan 09, 2012
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A time and place for both.Generally, I try to tolerate as much as I can and please people before I finally say the truth. Sometimes it's best to just tell the truth from the start, but I guess it depends on what it is. If it's hurtful or if you think it isn't going to cause damage to the relationship it's probably best to just stay quiet. If it's something serious that could cause probelems now or in the future than I wouldn't hesitate to say something.
Speaking the truth as long as there is a point, discussion and outcome. Honesty is how u maintain trust and respect. Without these things there isn't a relationship. If the point of the truth is to harm I try to be quiet but shutting my mouth isn't easy. I have learned this trait since I have gotten older. Bottom line is if u want to be happy and maintain happiness u must be honest.
The truth. It can always be done in love though
50/50 depends on the situation
It's not that I care about one more than the other, rather which one matters most at the time. If telling the truth pleases my partner then telling the truth wins. If lying pleases my partner but only temporary then I will tell him the truth for long term happiness.
Depends on the situation. I think we both choose our battles, at least for me, if it's something I strongly feel I need to voice, I will...eventually. lol.
Speaking the truth, but I have found that it does little good to help or change anything. So I still speak the truth for myself because holding things just harms me, but I know that speaking the truth will not change anything